MAGA and Trumpcompetence – Congratulations
Well, MAGA — break out the confetti. Your guy did it. Let’s take a moment to appreciate everything Donald Trump has accomplished with your enthusiastic support.
He reopened the Strait of Hormuz.
The same Strait of Hormuz that was fully open before the U.S. and Israel launched airstrikes on Iran on February 28 Wikipedia — and was only closed because Iran shut it in retaliation for the war Trump started. So to be crystal clear: Trump created the crisis, then declared victory for partially solving it. And not even fully solving it. Iran’s foreign minister made clear that ships wanting to pass through would need to coordinate with Iran’s military, with limitations on the number of vessels — and Iranian media cited officials as saying ships would need to pay a toll. Axios The UAE’s industry minister put it plainly: “The Strait of Hormuz is not open. Access is being restricted, conditioned and controlled” by Iran. Council on Foreign Relations
So the strait is “open” — if you pay Iran, get Iran’s military approval, and accept that Iran now has institutionalized control over one of the most critical waterways on the planet. A waterway that was previously free for all vessels before Trump decided to start a war.
Tremendous victory.
He made you poorer.
Two weeks into the conflict, oil hit $119.50 a barrel and gas prices had risen 55 cents per gallon compared to the same time the previous year. NPR Even after the ceasefire, oil prices remain far above the pre-war levels of around $70 per barrel — and energy markets are likely to remain structurally elevated as governments hoard and restock in anticipation of renewed conflict. CNBC Every time you filled up your tank over the past six weeks, you were paying the Trump War Tax. You’re welcome.
He handed Iran more power, more money, and possibly more nuclear capability than it had before.
Iran’s 10-point ceasefire proposal — which Trump called a “workable basis on which to negotiate” Wikipedia — includes lifting of all primary and secondary sanctions against Iran, an acceptance of Iran’s nuclear enrichment program, Iranian coordinated control over the Strait of Hormuz with the ability to charge fees on passing ships, the withdrawal of U.S. forces from all bases in the region, and full compensation for damages Iran suffered during the war. Al Jazeera
Iran, for its part, claimed victory, asserting it had forced the U.S. to accept its demands. Wikipedia And they’re not wrong to claim it. Before this war, Iran was under crushing sanctions, its leadership was intact, and the strait was freely open. After six weeks of Trump’s “regime change” war: Iran can charge ships stiff levies to use the strait, quickly generating billions in new revenue PBS, sanctions relief is on the table, and Iran’s nuclear program remains active. Iran’s parliamentary speaker stated that any attempt to limit Iran’s enrichment of uranium would fail. Wikipedia
Mission accomplished.
He killed Americans and thousands of Iranian civilians.
Thirteen American service members are confirmed dead, with approximately 373 wounded — five of them seriously. Time These were real people with names and families. Army Sgt. Benjamin Pennington. Capt. Cody Khork of Winter Haven, Florida — a man whose family said he “felt a calling to serve his country” and “lived with purpose, loved deeply, and served honorably.” Time They deserved better than to die in a war with no plan and no clear objective.
On the Iranian side, as of April 7, human rights organizations documented at least 3,636 deaths due to U.S.-Israeli strikes, including 1,701 confirmed civilians. Wikipedia That includes schoolchildren — at least 15% of total casualties were under the age of 18. Wikipedia And the president who threatened to obliterate Iran’s civilian infrastructure called the Iranian people “animals” while doing it. You don’t need a history book to recognize what it looks like when a leader dehumanizes a civilian population he’s bombing. The comparison writes itself, and it isn’t comfortable.
He triggered a market rally — by agreeing to stop doing the thing he was doing.
Yes, stocks surged on news of the ceasefire. S&P 500 futures popped 2.57% before the open in New York. South Korea’s KOSPI was up 6.87%. Japan’s Nikkei 225 was up 5.39%. Fortune Markets celebrated because Trump agreed to stop bombing a country. Just like they surged when the Supreme Court struck down his tariffs. The market keeps throwing parties every time Trump stops getting his way. At some point you have to ask yourself what that tells you.
He weakened NATO while strengthening Russia.
Trump spent this war alienating every ally he needed. France refused to participate. Spain closed its airspace to U.S. planes involved in operations against Iran. Al Jazeera Our partners — the ones Trump spent years insulting — watched him start a war without consulting them and then refused to bail him out. Meanwhile Trump waved through a Russian oil tanker breaking his own Cuba blockade without so much as a tariff threat, actively helping fund Putin’s war in Ukraine while demanding European loyalty he had done nothing to earn.
Here’s the final tally of Trump’s great Iran adventure:
Thirteen Americans dead, 373 wounded. Time Over 3,600 Iranians killed, including nearly 1,700 confirmed civilians. Wikipedia Oil prices structurally elevated above pre-war levels. Tens of billions added to the national debt. Iran retaining nuclear enrichment capability. Iran now charging tolls on a strait that used to be free. Sanctions relief for Iran on the table. A hardline Iranian government still in power. NATO weakened. Russia strengthened. America’s moral authority on civilian infrastructure and international law — obliterated, possibly permanently. And the two nations that emerged from all of this in objectively better strategic positions than when it started are Russia and Iran.
The man who was going to “totally obliterate” Iran ended up handing it leverage it never had before, while losing 13 Americans, spending billions of dollars, and making the entire world less safe.
There’s no word in the English language adequate to describe this level of strategic failure. So I’ll coin one:
Trumpcompetence.
The unique, singular ability to enter a situation as the most powerful nation on Earth and exit it having handed your adversaries everything they wanted — while calling it a total victory.
And MAGA? You cheered for every single step of it.
Congratulations on your Trumpcompetence. You earned it.
